Posted by Tiffany Cooper
My children have developed a new skill, manipulation. Here’s how it goes:
Child #1: Do you want to play house with me?
Child #2: Not now.
Child #1: Well, if you don’t play house with me now I won’t play with you ever again. (Said in a calm “I’ve got the control” tone.)
I was a little shocked at first because I didn’t teach them to be manipulative, they figured it out on their own. At the core, their motive was selfishness. I stood in the kitchen thinking about this when my heart was struck with the realization that I have moments when I do the same thing in my relationship with the Lord. Sure, it doesn’t happen often but trying to push my weight around with God once is one time too many.
Example: Lord, you know that I love you. You know that I have committed my life to you and have dedicated my life to the full-time call of ministry. And Lord, sometimes this requires more sacrifice than I imagined. But I am more than willing to press forward if I can have “that thing” I feel I deserve. Because Lord, I know you want me to have the desires of my heart. (Said in a calm “I’ve got the control” tone.) 🙂
Although it physically pains me to admit these thoughts, not only to you but to myself, they have gone through my mind. Imagine me trying to manipulate God! Sure, I didn’t set out to intentionally manipulate Him but that was the result.
My Perceived Sacrifice + God Fulfilling My Request = The Pay Off
I now feel quite immature thinking about my momentary manipulation/selfishness. After all, everything I am, everything I have and everything I am to become is from God. I am nothing without Him. It is the highest privilege to serve Him and His call in ministry.
Am I alone ladies? Do you play momentary games with God? How do you eliminate these types of thoughts?