Posted by Tiffany Cooper
Happy Thursday Ladies! We are continuing our discussion “The PK Life” today, focusing on the teenage perspective. Naturally, the views and feelings expressed may not apply to every single teenage PK.
Meet Michael (his name has been changed), he is a senior in high school.
Meet Sarah (name also changed), she is providing the female teen perspective.
Michael and Sarah expressed a similar feeling in the interview.
Michael’s Quote: “If you skrew up or have a personal secret you can tell NO ONE, not even your parents.”
Sarah’s Quote: “I’ll never be as good as I should be. People have this idea of who I should be. I love God but I can never measure up. I have struggles, I’m not what I want to be. My parents would be disappointed if they knew who I really was.”
When asked about their overall feeling as a PK…
Michael said, “I personally don’t mind it. The only downfall is that you can’t talk to your parents or anyone about what to do in your walk with God because they believe that you should already know.”
Sarah said, “I can’t imagine a different life. I want to be a PK but I just struggle with feeling like I live in this secret world. I look perfect but I’m alone. I don’t have any real friends and I don’t talk to anybody about how I really feel. But I really do feel like I get to live a special life.”
Born and raised a PK myself, I can fully relate to their feelings. I loved God and I truly loved church but, I never felt I could measure up to the ideal. Did my parents create an ideal for me to fit? Absolutely not! Looking back I realize it was a subtle, unspoken idea that formed in my mind due to others comments.
So how can we as parents combat this silent, and sometimes verbal, pressure? We can be the loudest voice in our kids’ lives. I shared my thoughts on this very topic during the JustOne Virtual Conference. You can listen here. You can also listen to great wisdom from Lori Wilhite, Heather Whittaker and Kay Warren.
Today I encourage you with 3 things:
1. Just because you don’t place ministry pressure on your kids doesn’t mean they are pressure free. DO NOT judge your kids feelings by their outside appearance/actions. PK’s can be masters of disguise, looking fantastic and hurting inside.
2. Talk Often. Talk Openly. It’s not a one and done conversation. As your kids grow and experience knew seasons of life, their feelings about being a PK may change. Talk without judgment, be the person they can be real with. What a privilege we have to be the most influencing and shaping voice in their lives!
3. Keep your ministry perspective positive. Be real about the unique pressures of the pk role, however, never make it an overall negative. Ministry is a privilege. Encourage them with the advantages! Cheer them on! Let them know that you have their back, all the time, no matter what! They come before the ministry!
Bottom Line: Talk, Talk, and Talk. Start with a letter if you are uncomfortable approaching your kids. Whatever it takes, cover it in prayer and start the dialogue.
Join us next Thursday for more on The PK Life!
