Archive for the ‘Marriage’ Category

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Calling or Not?

Monday, September 22nd, 2008

 

Last week someone found my blog by googling, “is it a calling to marry a pastor?”  So, what do you think?

 

I believe that God totally has the matchmaking in hand. But I wonder if it is a “calling” to be a Pastor’s wife. I’ve said it before, but I would have married Jud if he flipped burgers. And I do think that it is super important for wives to be bought into the dream of ministry.  And I know that, like myself, many women feel “called to be in ministry” and are married to pastors or leaders. But I knew a girl several years ago that felt “called to marry a pastor” when she was a Senior in High School. She did marry a guy who went into youth ministry. She happily served alongside him and was awesome. Then, about three years in, he decided he didn’t want to do ministry anymore and got into the insurance business. Where did that leave her? I always felt sorry for her and wondered if the true call was for her to be in ministry and if she thought the only way to do that was to be married to a pastor. I don’t know though.

 

What do you think? Calling or not?

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Week of Links III

Monday, September 8th, 2008

 

I just found Angie’s blog or I should say … she found me. And I’m so glad that she did.

 

A little bit ago she did this great post about putting your husband first. She says:

 

Now, as a wife, I take the same pride in knowing my husband better than anyone else does.  It should be one of my top priorities.

There should be no one – no woman at work, friend from childhood, or even family member -  that knows him, really knows him…down deep, the way that I know him.

I need to know him - inside and out - what really makes him tick…his dreams, his fears, his strongest strengths and weakest weaknesses….

 

 

It takes lots of time to really make sure you are getting to know the things in your husband’s world. Right now Jud and are getting to go on Day Dates. It is awesome. Fridays are Jud’s day off and now Ethan goes to preschool on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings. So every Friday Jud and I get to have breakfast together and three blissful hours of babysitting free time together. During that time we have a little “technology fast” to make sure that we aren’t interrupting our time together. No computers, no cells, no internet on your cell. It is wonderful.

 

How are maximizing your time to make sure that no one knows your husband better than you?

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Another Woman

Tuesday, July 15th, 2008

 

We were about one month from our wedding the first time I got to experience someone falling for Jud. She was a married volunteer for us in our college ministry. She had started to pull him aside for serious chats and concerns that she had. There were looks that I noticed. Really it was nothing big that I noticed … just lots of little things. My women’s intuition had kicked in but in usual man-style, Jud didn’t think there was anything to it. Then I started getting approached by a few of the women in the church who had noticed similar things and said that I should do something about it. 

 

Once we got back from our honeymoon, we had to ask the couple to step down as volunteers. There were several reasons but obviously this crush was one of them. Then I had one of the most awful phone conversations I’ve had in ministry. She called me and chewed me out. And with all of my maturity and years of wisdom … I fought back. Not the best idea, but it is what I did. We yelled at each other on the phone for about 30 minutes – and in the end I told her to stay away from my man.

 

I think men in leadership are particularly vulnerable to this. It happens a lot. They are cute guys, who love God. That’s super attractive to lots of ladies. So, the issue then becomes how to protect yourselves and your marriage.

 

Has this ever happened to you? How did you handle the situation? (I’m certain that it was better than me)

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Week of Hot Sex

Tuesday, May 20th, 2008

The Deadly Viper guys, Mike Foster, Anne Jackson, and my husband Jud are tackling sex – no holds barred. Since I don’t have the guts to get near this detailed, ever, I wanted to link it here. Deadly Viper Character Assassins is all about living with radical integrity and radical grace. So, if you are interested in seeing what is going on at their blog, click here. If you decide to click over, put your seat belt on!

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